I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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