So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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