i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
