No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
