You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
