Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
