Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
