dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Randomize
