big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
