You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
i came on her dog
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
