I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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