hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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