I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
why is half of my head shaved?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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