i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Randomize