I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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