so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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