we're blogging at a bar
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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