Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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