Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
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