i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Be still, my beating vagina.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
