so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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