"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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