I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize