I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
