That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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