White coat. Heels.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Randomize
