Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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