do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Randomize
