I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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