I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
