I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Randomize
