Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
my being single is dangerous.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
