why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
