looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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