how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
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