It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
