Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
