i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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