He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
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