I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
