I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
