Define "chronic" masturbator.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Randomize
