so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
