it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Randomize
