Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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