Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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