trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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