side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
