no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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