so that wasnt chicken after all
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
he puts the penis in happiness.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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