we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
